find single ladies in my area to many different places in the world and several larger cities such as Toronto and Seattle and LA and ...
find single ladies in my area
to many different places in the world and several larger cities such as Toronto and Seattle and LA and New York. Okay, well, that's not that many but that's... Those are the big ones and I have found that the number one place that I have met people is at coffee shops. So, I do a lot of writing and when I go to coffee shops I always go by myself. The key is if you're going to go to a coffee shop do not have your ear buds in you got to take the ear buds out otherwise that's kind of a signal that you don't want to be disturbed and you're not open to communication or conversation. So, if you're going to go to a coffee shop definitely go by yourself and leave the ear buds at home. In fact, don't be distracted by your phone I know it's super tempting to have a distraction so you don't sit there feeling awkward. But try to actually just like enjoy your coffee or whatever beverage you purchase and be present and watch people. Do people watching, people watching is fun. And it will actually also challenge your ability to just be in crowds and with people without feeling like you have to have a distraction. So, it's kind of a double, double whammy, double whammy. So, you will actually get a chance to potentially meet people particularly women and you will also get to stretch your confidence muscle by being alone and out in public and open to the world. So, that's the first place and then the second place that is a really good place to potentially meet girls in a small town is if you volunteer. And I've done another video on this actually and it's called the best place to meet women or girls or something like that. Because when you volunteer you actually do have a reason for a distraction. So, you're there for a purpose you get to focus on the reason why you're there and then you also get to meet potentially other girls that are nice girls. Because if you're volunteering you know other than you showing up because you want to meet girls, most of the time that people who show up to volunteer and give off themselves are good people. And yeah, of course we all have our issues but at least there's a better foundation if you meet someone when you're volunteering. So, that’s another really good place to potentially meet girls. And then also remember that when you meet people through volunteering you can meet friends and it's not necessarily people that you're going to be dating. But they may have friends of friends and so on and so forth. So, that kind of brings me... Well, I'm going to save that one for last because the last one is the best one and the second last one, the second last one is the second best one so stay tuned for those. Okay, now the third place that is a really great place to potentially meet women or girls is in a dance class. The girls like to dance and if you join a class that needs extra bodies then there's a really high likelihood that the extra bodies they need in there are going to be men. Because there are definitely fewer men who sign up for dance classes. So, you know if you're in a small town yeah, you might have to learn how to dance with the grannies but just take it as practice. For when you actually meet that fabulous girl that you know loves to dance or even if she doesn't she might be impressed like actually know how to dance. So, that's again dual purpose you get to learn a new skill and there's a higher likelihood that you're going to be able to meet girls in that kind of class. Okay, so that's number three, right. Okay, number four. Number four is hobbies so if you have hobbies then, which is a good idea because otherwise, what are you doing with your life like you've got to have something that you're doing outside of work and outside of socializing if you have a social life. And again, we'll get to that one but if you are involved in types of hobbies then try to choose a hobby that there's a higher likelihood of you being able to actually meet girls at or women. Like for example, if you're into MMA that's awesome for physical fitness and a really great place to go to build up your self-confidence, but it's probably not the best way to meet women. Like, there will be girls definitely who will go to those types of classes but likely they're going to be highly out numbered by guys and unless you're the fittest and most talented guy in the group. Well, then that's not the place to meet girls but it is a great place to go to actually get fit and advance your fitness level in a particular type of activity that will be attractive to girls. So, that's kind of a little side note there this is why you should stick around through the middle of the videos because there's a little extra tidbits in the middle that are quite valuable if I do say so myself and I do because I just did. Okay, so that brings me to number five sports, are you into sports? If you're into sports then try to choose a sport again that either you really are passionate about, which is great just as an aside. But if you don't really have any particular passions then choose a sport where it could be more co-ed. So, volleyball for example you could do volleyball or you can... If you're not like a super athletic or feeling extroverted in that way then you can go hiking. Now, you have to... Of course depending on where you are you need to be careful when you go hiking by yourself because of cougars. And I don't mean my age group I mean wild animals in the bush. But if you join a hiking group then you can get fit and potentially meet girls who are also interested in hiking but don't want to hike alone. Women are really a lot more careful about hiking alone because it's twice as dangerous for women not just because of wild animals but because of wild men and crazies. So, we would tend to be more interested in joining a group hike if we don't have a friend to go hiking with. And if you meet a girl on a hike that has joined a hiking group then and it doesn't have to be hiking, but I'm just kind of going on this one. So, if you meet a girl who's joined a hiking group because she doesn't have friends that go hiking with. Well, all the better that you might actually get to go hiking with her and even if you start out as friends. I know, I know no one wants to start out as friends anymore but you know what here's another side note of all the couples that I've interviewed and there's been hundreds over many, many years. The ones that are still together after 10 years and are happy started out as friends as far as the girl was concerned. So, in other words 90% of the time of all the people that I've talked to the woman wasn't necessarily super attracted to the guy and sometimes not attractive at all in a physical way when she first met him and it grew from there. Now again, I know you have a hard time believing this because you're a guy and that makes sense because for guys the statistic was the opposite 90% of the time the guy was physically attracted to the girl that he did end up marrying and they're still happily together. Because guys are more physically attracted, they're more wired for physical sexual attraction whereas women bond based on other things. I've done other videos on that if you want a one a specific video on how women bond and fall in love then let me know. And write it in the comments below and I'll maybe do a video for you. Okay, so yes, so sports activities and if you have a sport that you're kind of curious about not sure if it might be a good place to meet women write it in the comments below and I'll let you know what I think. And also you know, if there's some kind of modification to it that might work for you. Okay, so that was number five, right. Okay, number six, maybe this is number seven I've lost track. Okay, so the next one is church are you a spiritual person you don't have to actually be religious to be spiritual. There's a lots of different types of spiritually based groups or places where you can gather with other people who have similar religious or spiritual beliefs as you. I mean people like to gather, right. So, if you go to a place where they've already believed in something that even if you believe in... If you don't believe in anything and maybe you're an atheist or an agnostic then join one of those groups. Because then you're going to find people who have a similar baseline to what you have and if you're not sure then it's a great place to explore. Go and make it a point to check off a bunch of different religions or spiritual places of worship on your list it could be freaking what's that called Kundalini. You should see what they do in Kundalini it's quite sexual actually there's a lot of tantric kind of energy in it. So, you might decide to go and make it a goal of yours to explore different types of spiritual groups to see what feels right for you. And then you can discover again two things one what actually fits for you in terms of spirituality, which is also really important in the wheel of life. And you might actually meet someone there who shares a similar viewpoint and that will create commonality and something that you can bond over. So, that is I think number seven. What is the next one? The next one is okay, I kind of alluded to this earlier, friends. You need to have friends. Now, you can meet friends through friends like that's another really, really common way to meet girls is by having friends. And going out in groups or gathering in groups or going to places in groups and meeting friends of friends. And inviting new people in, that's really the key. If you don't have friends it's really important for you to start learning how to develop friendships. When I was... I was super shy you know, for a long, long time it wasn't until my 30s I started getting out of that and learned how to get over shyness and until probably like my late 30s I really didn't have that many friends. I didn't have any friends that I hung out with because I felt, I felt I was really super sheltered and that was my own fault. But you know after I got divorced actually because my husband was my only friend for a very long time. We were together 13 years in case you're curious. Anyway, after we split up I thought you know what? Like I needed a support group and I really didn't have a lot of people to rely on other than my family. And so I started making a concerted effort to make friends. And you know what, it is kind of scary at first because you think what if I get rejected. But the reality is that most people are really uncertain about approaching other people for friendship. And I found that when I started doing that I now have too many friends, sorry friends. But I have so many friends that I really don't have enough time to spend quality time with all of them. And so, you know, you can get to a place where you are able to not mingle Because it didn't sound good ignores you're good. Where you're able to decide what kinds of friendships that you want or sometimes you have friends for activities. Sometimes you have friends who will listen to you vent about the truck outside that was really noisy or whatever. Like, there's different types of friendships they don't all have to be super deep and meaningful. But you do need to be able to spend time with people and when you can do that then you can start getting together and meeting friends through friends. And even as an introvert also I'm an introvert like I'm a super introvert, which doesn't mean I'm shy. Shyness and introversion are two different things and it can be a challenge when you're introvert to get together in group settings. But still you can go to a group event with a friend and you don't won't feel so alone if you do have an issue with going to things alone and a lot of people do, like I used to myself. And what I found now is that I can invite friends to certain events or activities or what have you where there's going to be other people there, potentially other people that they know like in the city I go to a lot of art events and because I like art even though I couldn't draw stick figure if you put a pencil in my hand. Okay, anyway, so the point is that friendships are super important because they're essential for human connection and as well they are also a great way a very traditional way of meeting girls. And a lot of people have got together through meeting people through other people actually another side note I run... I was on my bike the other day and there was a couple in front of me. And I had literally just pulled up to them and she... I can't remember what she said something about stilettos or something, but I could tell by the tone of his voice that they were on a first date. So, I ended up veering off and then I was so curious that I turn around and went back and caught up with them and they were... He was actually just going into like a washroom or down by the seawall. And so, I asked her if they were on a first date and she was so surprised and was like yeah, how'd you know? And I said because of the tone of voice because they were both using their, not their real voice. Like, their real voice... Your real voice, which I've also done a video on is the voice that you use with your friends. So, be really you know like the more you not using your real voice when you're on a date it shows how nervous you are. So, like for example, I'm using my real voice right now it's fits deeper and I'm really going off in a tangent here. Anyways, it's deeper than I would necessarily use when I'm meeting a guy for the first time that I might be attracted to. So, if I've ever met you and my voice was higher I was probably attracted to you. You blew it you could have had me, just kidding don't come find me. Okay, and then finally the last and most courageous place to meet girls in a small town is to create a meet up group. So, I've noticed that when I go home to my hometown, which is smaller I look at meet up that actually, there's a website meet up and there's like nothing going on there. So, if you actually want to meet people who are interested in some of the same things you are then create your own meet up group. And it can be like a meet up group that's for gaming or it could be a meet up book club group or it can be a meet up hiking group or it can be whatever it is that you actually have a genuine interest in. That you wouldn't mind having a conversation with someone about. So, you meet at a coffee shop obviously somewhere that is safe and neutral for a girl to show up to. And you put it out there put out, you put it out there. And then you see who shows up and maybe nobody does and maybe somebody does you only need one unless you're into polyamorous relationships and that's not my specialty. So, if you are really brave and that actually also is super attractive if you if you are the organizer of the meet up group. Because that shows you have leadership skills and confidence to put yourself out there not knowing if anyone is even actually going to show up. So, if you can do any of those things then you have a really ...
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