scrambler technique does no contact work when a girl starts pulling away should you use the no contact rule when you sense a girl...
scrambler technique
does no contact work when a girl starts pulling away should you use the no contact rule when you sense a girl's interest is starting to dwindle in it's getting harder to get her to meet up when she's not responding to your text as quickly or when she does respond it's these short half-assed replies in those moments should you go no contact with her that's what we're going to cover in this video hi I'm Bobby Rio and a situation I run into all the time with clients is a girl that they had been hanging out with whether it was a few dates maybe it's even a girl that they were dating for a while she starts to pull away sometimes it's it's subtle where they just notice a change in her other times she verbalizes it and says something like we need space or I need time to think or let's slow things down when this happens you may or may not be wondering if you should do no contact if you don't know what no contact is there's a rule that you may or may not have heard about called the no contact rule which essentially means you should just totally avoid contacting a woman for a specified amount of time maybe one week maybe two weeks maybe 30 days if a girl's pulling away will this work well let's let's back up a little bit because before you know if it works you kind of have to know know where you stand with her and where you stand in your own mind because most of the time when this starts happening guys go into what I call emotional quicksand when we have a woman and we're enjoying it where we think it's going somewhere and all of a sudden we sense she's slipping away it it we go into like I said emotional quickstand and you don't think right you can't make right decisions in that moment because it's like you're playing from it's almost like if you've ever known a gambler and when a gambler's lost and he's trying to win back his money it's like he just starts losing even more and more money because he's in a really bad place and that's what happens to us when a woman starts flipping away we get obsessed with her all we can talk about with our friends is asking her all these you know questions what should I do how can I get her back and you're coming from a really desperate place and when you're in this place a few things one is a woman can immediately tell that you're in this place which actually pushes her further away because she can sense that desperation in you you're also not going to make the right decisions because you're going to start convincing yourself of things that may or may not be true I've been there where a woman starts slipping away and I convince myself well it's because she didn't know how much I liked her and then I went and did things like you know send her a long sappy email telling her how much I like her some guys may buy her a gift right these are these are mistakes I call them sort of the nice guy mistakes men make when a woman Slips Away we think if she only knows how much I like her that's going to make her stay and a lot of times that's our first instinct our first instinct is to make one of these mistakes and we confess our feelings or we give her a gift or or we apologize or explain ourselves and when you do this you're actually causing her to become less attractive to you because here's the thing about when a woman's pulling away there's something that we we kind of refer to as like the the attraction scale and one of the reasons a woman will pull away is because she senses that you're like here on the scale and she's here meaning you've already given your hand to her she already knows like you she's got you you want to be her boyfriend you see a future with her and she might be here where she's enjoying her time with you but she's not ready to like commit to you yet she's having doubts she's you know she's into you but she's not like at the same level as you and that's why it almost never works confessing your feelings but you're essentially putting a lot of pressure on her because it's like well I really like you and she's like well I'm still deciding about you and now if I get back with you and we continue this it's almost like I'm committing to something that I'm not ready to commit to so that's why confessing your feelings will almost never work in this situation the reason I bring all this up is because a lot of guys wait until after they've made all these mistakes and then they go okay I'm gonna do no contact I confess my feelings and she's still pulling away so now now I'm going to do no contact and when you do that and I wrote some notes down here right when you do that and you disappear after she's given you the speech then in her mind she's like oh man I really hurt this guy's feelings he liked me so much and she kind of pities you but there's a weird element of okay you're not reaching out to her you're maybe ignoring her a little bit but it doesn't come from a place of strength it comes from a place of desperation and she knows that she knows that you're really butt hurt and that's why you're not responding to her and that's why you've gone kind of Silent which doesn't make her more attracted to you it actually doesn't accomplish anything right it gives her an out so does no contact work in that situation no there's times where no contact will work and I'm going to explain them but there's a better way to handle it when you've made mistakes and there's actually a better way to handle it all around which I'm going to talk about in a second so one of the things that I wrote down here is preemptive and you always want to be thinking preemptively meaning if you've been in a situation where where a woman starts pulling away there's always signs that that are coming it never happens like overnight it's usually if you've been hanging out with her a few times you'll notice something changing you'll be hanging out with her maybe you're on a date with her and there's little subtleties that you pick up on and a lot of times they're like surface level meaning you can't quite even explain it but you notice it your gut is telling you like hmm something changed you know maybe she's not laughing at your jokes as loudly as she used to or maybe when you go to you know you go to touch your arm she kind of like hesitates and kind of freezes up a little bit these little things that are very subtle you pick up on and you sense that she's slipping away here's the thing once you sense it it's a lot easier in that moment to turn it around before you go and you make all those mistakes like confessing your feelings and all that sort of stuff now if you've already made those mistakes you can still turn it around in a large percentage of the time but not by continually making more of those stakes and also not by completely going no contact here's what I mean so one of the things that I always say is no contact is not really the right word that I tell guys to use right because it's no contact is an emotional reaction meaning she kind of knows what's going on if if you're like ignoring her and and like blocking her and all that sort of stuff it's a reaction she knows this guy likes me so much and he's so emotionally reacted to what's going on that he had to block me because he can't even handle seeing me which does not increase your value in her eyes so what I always say is do a sub dude version of no contact where it's almost like you're mirroring her meaning that that that feeling that you got when she starts slipping away you almost want to give her that feeling back meaning you want to change your communication where she feels like she's losing her power over you because there's one thing about human right human nature and basically everything in the dating world is psychology everything in everywhere is psychology right sales is psychology dating is psychology everything is psychology when you understand human psychology if you understand there's a very strong human tendency to not want to lose something that we have it's it's just human tendency right we value something the most as we feel we're losing it for instance if you've ever been in a situation where you were bidding on let's say a house you were you were going to go buy a house and you thought you had the house and you were kind of like I I'm nervous I don't know if I want this house but then the realtor calls and tells you somebody else put an offer in and the seller is going to accept that offer all of a sudden you're like I gotta have it I don't want to lose that house it was so perfect right two days ago you weren't so sure but the minute you sense you're losing it that's when the uh desire to to hold on to it kicks in and part of the reason we get into emotional quicksand when a woman starts slipping away is because of the same thing when you have a woman and you feel good about yourself and she's into you and you're like man this is so well and then you sense her slipping away that same fear of loss kicks in where you where you're like almost desperate to hold on to her so knowing this you want to give her that same feeling in a subtle way you want her to feel like she's slowly losing you and you may think well if she's pulling away why would she care if she loses me because she's pulling away knowing that you're on the back burner that you really like her she if she decides she likes you she could come back and that kind of gives her the the peace of mind to explore her options and be like well I can you know he's there if I if I need him on the other hand and it feels good for her right because you're you're kind of like she's you you're boosting her ego you're actually giving her confidence to go out and and explore her options because she's like well that guy he was really cool and that guy really liked me so let me see right um on the other hand if she senses like you you're not quite as enchanted with her and you do the same thing you don't tell her that you don't you just give her that same feeling when I talked about those subtle differences that she did to you it's kind of like you find subtle differences to do to her where she gets that feeling like this guy doesn't quite I don't quite have the the power and the control over him that I used to he doesn't see me as so special anymore right she might not be thinking those things but that's what she's feeling she's feeling that her hold over you is slipping away and that kicks in that fear of loss so uh one of the things I always say is well guys will always say to me well how do I how do I ask her out how do I continue things but also act like I'm slipping away and the answer that I give them is subdued interest and a time restraint right and it's almost like you want a beater to it because a lot of times she kind of probably wants to hang out with you she's still kind of curious now there's sometimes where a woman is gone right she's just mentally she's already banging her ex-boyfriend and she's totally forgotten about you and in those situations yes just disappear whatever I'm talking about the times where it's like she's still there but but you you know you're about to lose her so in those situations you do want to get her out but you don't want to come across as desperate so one of the things I always say is use a time constraint beat her to that because in her mind she's like I'm not sure I don't want to go out with him again because I'm not sure and then I'm going to be stuck and it's going to be weird so you can beat her to it and say Hey you know hey be um cool to hang out I I have a you know I got a lot of stuff going on this week but I have about 20 minutes um before you know 20 minutes after work or I have whatever whatever time you want to say I have 40 minutes after work uh let's let's grab a drink and catch up because now you're almost making it like your time is valuable you don't want to dedicate too much time for her and that allows her to put her guard down because now she's like oh okay but it also allows her to go wait a minute why is he not having a lot of time for me he should he should have all the time in the world for me he you know I'm the one who I'm the one who's deciding what I want and now and again this seems silly it seems like games but it's psychology it's just what goes through our mind so you're actually reversing it a little bit by using this sort of time constraint with her and then doing subdued interest let her work start working again to win you over when you do meet up with her it's not about trying to convince her that you're this awesome guy that you guys should be together it's about leaning back changing your behavior a little bit and let her feel that and have her start working to win you over a little bit working to get you interested again because if she doesn't do that she's not going to Value you and she doesn't value you she's not going to stay with you right so you you need to let her get invest it into things again and she's only going to get invested in things if she feels like she has to win you back a little bit because if she knows that she has a 100 hold over you what happens what do I always say if a woman knows she has you 100 she loses interest now if you want sort of a step-by-step way to do this then I I really recommend watching my Scrambler video because in that video I kind of walk you through it because I went through a lot of stuff quickly because I did want to answer a specific question of does no contact work and I wanted to explain how no contact works but with different variations of it meaning I usually never recommend a guy goes completely cold no contact with a woman unless she's really like disrespected him and in that case it's like or unless he's in such emotional quicksand that he actually needs to distance himself because I've been there I've been there where like I've been so [ __ ] up in the head over a girl where it's like I know I'm gonna do the wrong thing right like if I get in front of her I'm gonna mess up so in those situations you're better off for your own sake doing no contact but it's not for her it's for you if you're trying to win her back this subdued version of mirroring her and letting her feel like she's losing you slowly losing you actually works a lot better if you want to sort of a step-by-step way to do it watch my Scrambler video below because I teach that technique I call it the second chance technique because this is just sort of scratching the surface of of getting her back right because you've got to actually reel her back in it's not a matter of oh oh he seems a little less interested I automatically want him it's reeling her back in in a way that makes her feel like it's her idea to start chasing you so I put a link for that below watch that video let me know what you think if you like this video hit like subscribe and leave me a comment and let me know what you want to hear about next time foreign ...
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